Seventeen Lords, Seventeen Lovers
by Sylveon Lord
Summary: Lissa learns of her brother's unrequited love for a young Einherjar by the name of Eirika. However, as she tries to bring them together, the hidden feelings of history's greatest heroes begins to unravel as she loses control of her scheme... (Lord seventeensome)
1. Chapter 1

**Hi! Welcome to Chapter 1 of ****_Seventeen Lords, Seventeen Lovers_****! This is a random crackfic featuring this shipping:**

**Marth/Alm/Celica/Sigurd/Seliph/Leif/Roy/Eliwood/Hector/Lyn/Eirika/Ephraim/Ike/Micaiah/Chrom/F!Robin/Lucina**

**So without further ado...**

**(Oh wait further ado)Disclaimer: I don't own FE, since Einherjar can't support. I also don't own the quote to open this.**

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**Seventeen Lords, Seventeen Lovers**

_"Don't let two men fall in love with you, girls. It's not the sort of thing that ends well."-Uncle Charles"_― Ally Carter, _Uncommon Criminals_

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**Chapter 1**

Princess Lissa of Ylisse strode through camp, gasping a little as she bumped into her older brother, a tall, clumsy man in his twenties with blue hair and eyes. "Hi Chrom," she said cheerily.

"Huh?! Oh… hello, Lissa. What might you be doing?" He said, quickly hiding a small Rapier that was wrapped in a green ribbon, but it didn't escape Lissa's sharp eyes.

"Whoa, Chrom, did someone give that to you?" Lissa asked, eyes widening.

"Erm…" Chrom glanced toward the other end of the camp. There, a young girl with teal hair, a red tunic, and a small sunshine yellow breastplate sat, happily chatting with a brunette boy in white armor. Chrom stared at her enamored expression as she spoke to the boy for a moment, before turning back to his sister. "Um…"

"Eirika gave that to you? That's strange. She seems to be doing nicely with Leif…" Lissa skipped off and into a nearby bush to spy on her brother since she had her suspicians, leaving behind a somewhat relieved Chrom.

"Lord Chrom?" Chrom jolted at the voice. "Are you okay?" Chrom turned, blue eyes meeting blue as he looked at the fiery-haired Lord Eliwood of Pherae.

"Just a case of unrequited love." Chrom mumbled, knowing that Eliwood was dealing with a similar issue. He indicated Eirika and Leif, who had been joined by Tellius's young Priestess of Dawn, a silver-haired maiden by the name of Micaiah.

"With which one? Please tell me it's not Micaiah…"

Chrom shook his head. "No, Eirika. Do you have any advice?"

"Nope. If I did I wouldn't be in the same situation."

Eliwood and Chrom walked off, making small talk as they went. Lissa giggled a bit. "Eirika huh? Oh Chrom, you can never hide anything from your little sister! This will be fun…" And with that, the blonde princess skipped off, ready to plot out ways to bring together her brother and Eirika. And in the meantime, aid Eliwood. Little did Lissa know, her interference was not just going to affect her brother, Eirika, Eliwood, and Micaiah…

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**Finding a quote for this took a while. I've never read that book, I found the quote on the Internet.**

**Oh, Liz (I called her Lissa in fic because of canon, I prefer Liz...). As usual, you make love happen in my fics. I dunno why, but I always want to give this role to Liz specifically.**

**If you're not questioning my sanity already, you should be.**

**-Glac**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2! Hooray...**

**Disclaimer: See chapter 1 because I'm lazy.**

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**Chapter 2**

Seliph splashed some of the stream water on his face and sighed. He had been in the Ylissian army for some time, and was quick to befriend the commander's younger sister, Lissa. It was a clear day, but Seliph hadn't seen Lissa outside yet. Sighing, the young Jugdrali stood up. He strode through the camp, letting the wind whistle by as he approached Lissa's tent.

"Lissa? It's noon. Are you doing something?" He called.

"Seliph? It is fine, come in. I want you to help with something." Quietly, Seliph pushed the flap aside and walked in, before sitting across from Lissa, who was seated at a table in the back of the tent.

"I was wondering what you were up to." Seliph said, smiling slightly. "What's that?" He indicated the parchment sitting on the table.

"This?" Lissa said, beaming proudly. "…Is only how we're setting up my brother with Eirika."

"We?" Seliph said, confused. "When did I agree to this?"

"Technically, you haven't yet. But I really need your help! Please Seliph!"

"I only said that I hadn't agreed, not that I will not agree. It's fine by me."

"Thanks Seliph! Now, we're going to speak with Eirika. She's completely smitten with your cousin, and we need to get her attention off Leif first. Do you know if Leif likes anybody?"

"Um… Micaiah. But you're trying to get Micaiah with Eliwood according to this…" Seliph said as he perused the plan. "Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Hmmm…" Lissa mumbled. "That complicates things. Do you think you can talk to Micaiah? I suppose I can't help Eliwood while helping Chrom…"

"I can try, but she never wants to speak with me."

"I'll be able to try, too. And don't even think about abandoning this, I'll tell my dear brother and my nephew exactly what you think of Lucina…"

Seliph began to blush uncontrollably. "All… all right! I'll go… speak to Micaiah." And with that, Seliph left the tent, ready to search for the Maiden of Dawn.

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**Yes, so... that's that. I dunno why I chose Seliph for this role. Impulse, I guess.**

**Come join the RANDOM because reasons. There's a link on my profile.**

**-Glac**


	3. Chapter 3

**What do you know, a short chapter. I'm Glac, of course it's short.**

**Disclaimer: I'm lazy so see Ch 1.**

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Chapter 3

Seliph walked through the camp in his search for Micaiah in no particular pattern. He had figured that she would appear if he wandered aimlessly. And appear she did, singing with some canaries at the edge of camp. "Micaiah?" Seliph said. "I know you usually don't wish to talk to me… but can I tell you something?"

"What is it?" Micaiah asked. The canaries began to quiet and watch intently.

"You're really pretty, and well… a few guys admire you. One of them is—"

"You?" Micaiah asked.

"Yes. Wait, what?"

"Wow Seliph… I didn't think you actually returned my feelings…"

"Wait, huh? I-I… I didn't mean it like that! I…"

"There's no need to say it." Micaiah said. "Come on Seliph, let's go tell everybody!"

"I… no…I…" Seliph mumbled. _Oh gods… _He thought as the young Dark Mage pulled him along. _What have I gotten myself into… Lucina…_

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**Oh, who would have guessed. I mean, anyone who saw the chart knows Micaiah likes Seliph, so...**

**You are hereby commanded to join the RANDOM!**

**-Glac**


	4. Chapter 4

**I feel more obligated to work on this now that it has a thread.**

**Disclaimer: Refer to Chapter 1.**

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Chapter 4

Leif stared, jaw agape, at the scene playing out before him. _Seliph said he liked Lucina! Why did he just say he likes Micaiah? And he was one of the people I told… They're coming this way!_ Leif thought as Micaiah dragged Seliph towards him.

"Save me." Leif thought he saw Seliph mouth, but quickly shook it off as an illusion.

"What do you need?" Leif said, putting on a false smile for Micaiah.

"Seliph said he likes me!" Micaiah exclaimed. "Isn't it great?"

Leif looked from the excited Micaiah to the slightly frightened looking Seliph. "Um Micaiah, can I speak to my cousin? Alone?"

"Yes, of course." Micaiah said, recovering her usual demeanor. The young Trickster led his cousin over to a small spot by the stream, which was filled with clear, quickly flowing water.

"Well?" Leif asked. "What happened? You said you liked Lucina."

"I… I thought she said your name at first, and then realized she meant me. Leif I… I'm so sorry…" Seliph trailed off.

"How do you plan on fixing this?"

"I don't know. I don't want to tell her the truth; she probably would never speak to me again…"

"Figure out a way." Leif said, turning. "And come back only when you do." And with that, the Trickster left his cousin by the stream, hiding his tears as he went.

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**I need to write longer chapters. Oh well.**

**As I said in the starting A/N, this has a thread now. It can be found in the written work section of Serenes Forest.**

**-Glac**


	5. Chapter 5

**Welp, Chapter 5! Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: You should know this already!**

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**Chapter 5**

Lucina plopped down next to Marth, letting out a small sigh as she did so. "What do you suggest I do?" She asked the Hero-King, glancing at him in admiration.

"About Sigurd?" Marth asked, looking at the Paladin, who was speaking to his nephew Leif and nodding. "Don't ask me. I can barely speak to Celica."

"Is something happening, Lucina?" Lissa asked, approaching the two blue-haired sword-wielders.

"Oh, it's nothing Aunt Lissa…" Lucina said. Lissa followed her young niece's gaze and let her eyes settle on Sigurd.

"Did something happen to Sigurd?" Lissa asked, fully aware of the other princess's feelings for the Jugdrali.

"No, nothing…" Lucina mumbled.

"He's still paying more attention to Lyn, isn't he?" Lissa asked.

"Yeah…"

"I happen to know someone…"

"Yourself?"

"No, silly. Let me finish!" Lissa huffed in annoyance. "I happen to know someone who really likes you."

Though the Ylissian princesses did not know, they had a red-haired onlooker to their scene. Roy, Elibe's 'Young Lion', suddenly furrowed his brow in confusion. _Lissa knows I like Lucina? And she's telling her? Oh no… _He thought.

"Who is it?" Lucina asked, curiously.

"Oh, he would be mad if I told. But be wary of it!" Lissa finished, skipping away, leaving behind a confused Lucina, internally giggling Marth, and relieved Roy.

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**Nothing else to say... Except sorry to keep you waiting!**

**-Glac**


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